Break
by Arnica
Summary: Set directly after Untittled, Things are fine now because Sirius is back at school and away from home, right? But as nightmares and blackouts begin to plage and somber the most carefree of Maruders it's up to them to save Sirius from the most dangerous of
1. In which everything is normal, but isn't

A/N. This follows directly after Untittled. As in, next day, directly after. I suppose you could read this by itself, but it really loses a bit of the emotional impact. Also, there is a bit of spanish in here as it is Massi's first language. She'll generally translate, if she doesn't, there's a key at the bottom of the chapter. In this AU, Massi and Sirius are a year older than the other Maruders, but started school later, so they are all still in the same year. 

Disclaimer: The Maruders, the train, nothing belongs to me except for Massi. But that's okay. I like My well enough for that to be okay. The idea of Lily as a Maruder also isn't mine, but it's not J.K's either. It's fannon, so I guess it's ours. Hey! lol. 

By the way, I don't have a definative tittle yet, so anyone who can help me will be my hero for the duration of the story and beyond. 

Break 

In which everything is normal, but isn't 

" Hola mi amigos!" Three of four male Maruders peered over the top of their chairs as the last member of their group made her presance known in the last car of the Hogwarts express. 

" Massi!" She grinned, cerulean eyes wide and delighted as she glomped onto James and Remus. 

" Ceul esta encime de mi Maruders?" The young woman chirped in her native, liting spanish. 

" My, I'm from bloody Yorkshire." Peter chided laughingly as he and Lily embraced her. " Maruders I understood, but the rest of it?" The girl smiled at him, glancing around the compartment. 

" I simply asked, what's up my Maruders?" Lifting a slender hand, she brushed back a long strand of dark brown hair. " So um, where's Siri?" James frowned, leaning in, speaking lowly. 

" He's asleep in the ass end. He, uh, he had another fight with Hank..." 

" Maldraion del dios!" She swore, marching past James towards the back, kneeling by where Sirius slept fitfully, his long frame curled tightly into the chair. With a small growled curse, she touched his face above a fresh bruise, tilting his head towards the side. " Mi Dios! Guys, come look at this!" She hissed, beckoning the others over towards her. " The son of a bitch choked him!" Her fingers traced lightly over the necklace of bruises encircling Sirius' neck, her eyes narrowing as he shuddered beneath her. " Remmy, hand me my wand? It's in my carry on." He handed her the supple rosewood wand. "Contusionare." She murmured, healing the marks on Sirius' skin. The youth relaxed slightly in the seat. 

" Poor Padfoot." Lily murmured sitting next to James, curling into his side. " It just gets worse every term." There was a moments silence as everyone took a seat. " What do you think he's dreaming about?" 

" Knowing Sirius?" Peter snorted. The others smiled some. 

" Sex." They chorused. 

************ 

Sept 1 1977 

I don't know why I always think it will be diffrent. Why I think things will get better over the summer. They always get worse instead. I didn't want to belive it could keep getting worse. That he would send Siri to school with those God be damned bruises. That he would choke him. I hate Hank Lonwell. I hate him more than anything. Maybe even more that the rumored Voldemort. What gives him the right to hurt Sirius like that? Sirius is asleep still and everyone is busy, but I wonder if they're all really thinking about Padfoot too? 

Massi 

************* 

_" Please?!" Sirius fell to his knees before the spider queen, who sat on her delicate throne. " IT's going to get me, you have to help me!" She turned her empty black eyes on Sirius. _

" Sorry mate." She rose, the silver silk webbing of her gown clinging to her dark body. " Not my problem." And she stepped aside and IT began to chase him again. Ahead, the glowing light that could drive IT away and Sirius smiled tiredly, running a bit faster until a blur of silver streaked by his vision, encasing him totally, knocking him to the ground and dimming the light. 

" NO! You bastard!" Sirius began to writhe and fight to free himself. " Let me go or I'll kill you!" A voice chuckled, filling the air around him. " I swear I will. I will...! I'll kill you!" 

************* 

" I'll kill you!" Everyone looked up in shock as Sirius sat upright in his seat, yelling. Massi and Remus dropped to his side almost immediantly. 

" Sirius, what's wrong?" Massi fretted, placing her hand against his forehead as Remus took Sirius' hand in his own. 

" Yeah, are you okay?" The black-haired youth shook his head. 

" I'm fine.. Just had a nightmare." Massi's eyes clouded in concern. 

" A nightmare? About what?" Sirius shrugged, barely concerned. 

" Don't really remeber. Something about a woman in spiderwebs?" He shrugged. " Nothing important though if I can't remeber it." 

" What do you mean not important?" The others sighed as Sirius adn Massi settled for what could be one of their typical hour long arguments. " Sirius, you were screaming, 'I'll kill you, I swear I will, I'll kill you. ' That sounds pretty damn important to me!" 

" Hell My, if I was screaming that it was probally a great dream concerning Snape and a chain saw." He snorted. Massi simply glared at him. " Look, My, i'm not in the mood to be analyzed by you right now. It's been a rough summer." And turning pointedly, he leaned over to Remus and kissed the sandy-haired youth enthuastically. Beside them, Massi rolled her eyes and sighed as the two made up for the kiss Remus hadn't recived at the begining. " Now see?" Sirius finally asked a few moents later. " That is how you bring a man back to the land of the living My, not by shooting him silly with questions!" Massi snorted. 

" Humph, Remus would slap me from here back to Tobago if I tried that." Remus looked over at her, raising an eyebrow. 

" I resent the implication that I bitch-slap." Massi grinned at him appolegetically and Sirius smiled as he settled down between them, content that he had managed to destract Massi. 

************ 

9-1-77 

11:36 pm 

We've been back at Hogwarts for an entire six and a half hours and already things are getting weird. Sirius didn't want to come to bed tonight. He tried to stay up past sixth year curfew and then tried to sneak into Lily, Massi, Elenore's and dormroom, but it wasn't his normal, "I can do it, so I will do it and you can suck my arse"(I love it when he says it like that, arse) attitude. He looked desperately confused, like the girls knew something he needed, but Lily-billy's a prefect now and couldn't get in trouble this early in the year, so now Sirius is in his bed (which hasn't seen him on a first night since he was fifteen) and tossing around, murmuring and making little whimpering noises. He always sleeps badly the night term begins. That's why he always sleeps with me. Why he always used to sleep with me... It's too late at night to be insecure. 

R. Lupin 

******** 

So yeah, that's the end of the first chapter. By the way, can anyone who read Untittled tell what's going on in Sirius' dream? Here's the translations for Massi's various curses. Maldraion del dios: God Damnit. This list will generally be longer, but I didn't feel the need to over do it. Please review. I need to know if this story has any effect like the first did. 

And finally, for all of you who wanted to healing process to begin, for those of you who let me know how much Untittled really meant to some people... To RavenLady, Katharos, Lorelei, Echo, Lindsay Beth, *Altra*, Siria Snape, Padfoot's girl, Eloria, my darling King Zoe and espically nortylaK, who through this has become a dear friend. This one is for you. 


	2. In which things start unwravelling

A/N. This follows directly after Untittled. As in, next day, directly after. I suppose you could read this by itself, but it really loses a bit of the emotional impact. Also, there is a bit of spanish in here as it is Massi's first language. She'll generally translate, if she doesn't, there's a key at the bottom of the chapter. In this AU, Massi and Sirius are a year older than the other Maruders, but started school later, so they are all still in the same year. 

Disclaimer: The Maruders,Hogwarts, nothing belongs to me except for Massi. But that's okay. I like My well enough for that to be okay. The idea of Lily as a Maruder also isn't mine, but it's not J.K's either. It's fannon, so I guess it's ours. Hey! lol. 

Break 

In which things start unwravelling 

" Is everyone's name in the Hat?" Massi asked, reaching into the baseball cap and stiring the folded slips of paper there with her hands. " And the subject for my psyh review this year is....drumroll please?" The boys began slapping their legs in an imitation of a drum roll as Massi pulled out a slip of parchment with a flourish. " Sirius." For a moment the room was still. " Siri, are you all right with this? You know, you don't have to right?" The boy nodded off handedly. 

" Why not, I mean it's not like you're turning it in to one of the teachers at the end of term or anything." 

" Oh no! It's absoultly confidential. I mean, it's just a practice thesis. The only person who will ever see this is a college of my papi who is helping me work on my real thesis for next year and then I won't use your name." She hurried to reassure him. 

" Then it's fine. Come on." Sirius stood and streached. " We have to catch the last of breakfast or I'm gonna die! The first week of classes always makes me hungry." James snorted. 

_" Blinking_ makes you hungry Padfoot." Lily laughed, as James stomach growled. 

" Pot." She pointed to her boyfriend. " Kettle." She pointed to Sirius. James pointed back at her. 

" Smart-ass." Everyone else stood up. " Let's go eat already." 

They made it from breakfast to potions with less than a minuite to spare. 

" You _had_ to have a third helping of eggs, didn't you?" Massi accused Sirius teasingly as they slid onto their side of the room and began preparing the potions in groups of three. 

" Well, I _told_ you I was hungry." The youth defended. Remus simply rolled his eyes and began skinning shrivel figs. 

" Sirius, can you go get me the dragon's bile?" Remus asked, brushing back a strand of his ash blond hair. 

" Since you aren't helping." Massi added, lighting the fire under the cauldron. Sticking his tounge out at her, Sirius vaulted over the low table and sauntered over to the students cupboard, leaning in. 

" Hey Moony, I don't see it!" He yelled. " Where is it?" 

" It's on the third shelf from the bottom. Hurry up Sirius, people are behind you waiting." 

" Yes Black, _do_ hurry it up." Severus Snape complained in his soft aristocratic voice. Pretending not to hear him, Sirius began to hum as he lingered in the closet. " Oh, af all the...!" The class snickered as He pantomimed kicking Sirius in the arse. " You have to be the most ignorant..ugh! Just bloody well move!" He put his hand on Sirius' hip, giving him a small push out of the way and reaching into the cabinet. He was standing when he caught a glimpse of the other boy out of the corner of his eye. Sirius had stood upright suddenly, his eyes clenched shut, his hand trembling. " Black? What in the hell is wrong is wrong with you?" Several people looked up as the flask slipped from Sirius' badly shaking hands as he continued to just stand there silently, his shoulder heaving with quickening breaths. 

" Sirius?" Massi stood up as Sirius opened his eyes and with a roar of rage, dove at Severus, catching his throat with both hands. 

" Why can't you leave me alone!?" The class sat, rooted to their seats in shock as Sirius spun around, slamming the other boy into the stone wall, sobbing. " I'll kill you! I swaer I will! I told you I would...!" 

" S-Sirius! Stop!" Massi shrieked, dashing over to the large boy and grabbing one of his arms, pulling at him. 

" Basta Ya! Stop it Sirius! He can't breathe! Jesus! Remmy, come help me!" She pulled harder as he slammed Severus into the wall one last time before letting him fall to the ground. " Siri? Que Pasa!? Have you lost your fucking mind!?" She spun his unresisting body around, letting go of him as he slumped bonelessly to the floor, drawing his knees up to his head and curling into a ball, trembling again. Massi knelt down by him. " Lily, quick, check Severus! Someone go get Madame Pomfrey!" Out the corner of her eye she saw the slender pale frame of Lucius Malfoy dash out of the Potions dungon. 

" It wasn't him." Sirius' voice was small as he began to mumble, rocking back and forth. " It wasn't him. He didn't do anything..." 

" Sirius..." Remus knelt next to Massi. " Sirius Black, look at me!" Remus ordered. His nails dug through his palm in shock as Sirius looked up, his normally bright, eager black eyes dull and empty and broken. 

" I didn't mean it..." He whispered. " I-I didn't know it wasn't him. Those hands..." 

" Shhhh, Don't cry Siri." She cradled him against her like a child as he cried, letting Remus join them from behind as the class shuffeld nervously around them. 

They were in the same position when the headmaster appeared with the potions Mistress and Madame Pomfrey in tow. 

************

" Professor?" 

" Yes Ms. Douglas?" Massi slipped almost timidly into the Headmaster's office where he sat rubbing his brow tiredly. She walked over to the desk, a thick book in her arms. 

" I came to ask about what's going to happen to Sirius." The man frowned sadly, shaking his silvered head. 

" At the moment, he's facing expulsion." Professer Dumbledore sighed. " He could have killed Severus Snape today." 

" Will it go before the school board?" She asked nervously. The man nodded and she sighed in relief. " Then can I speak on Sirius' behalf?" The headmaster raised an inquisitive eyebrow and she rushed on. " See, anyone in that room could tell you that Sirius wasn't himself, and I know why." 

" Do you?" 

" Si! Look." She put the book down on the desk in front of the man, leaning over it excitedly. " This section I've got highlighted on links between Slective memory and Post tramatic stress disorder. It's mostly in medical terms, but what it says in Laymans is when a person suffers trauma they can't cope with, it's generally pushed to the back of the person's memories, but certian triggers or combinations of triggers can bring the memories or at least any emotions tied to it, to the forefront of the mind." Her cerulian eyes glowed with excitement. " It's pretty much an open and shut textbook case! I'm sure I could get it reduced to a suspenion if I could only speak. Por Favor? Please?!" The man was silent for a moment, his eyes trailing across the highlighted text. 

" What would you need?" He asked softly. Massi sighed in relief. 

" Just a pensive for visual referance and a lot of luck." 

" I can give you the first. You'll need to supply the second yourself." The man smiled. The girl grinned. 

" Thank you so much!" Gathering up the book, she dashed out of the room and down the stairs to where the others were waiting nervously at the enterance. " Si! He said yes!" She flew into Remus' arms. hugging him tightly. 

" He's letting me speak before the school board." She took a deep breath and stepped back, her face growing solomn. " How's Severus?" 

" He'll live. Padfoot cracked his head good against the wall though, he'll be out cold a while longer though." James said softly as they began walking slowly back towards the Gryffindor tower. 

" And Siri?" 

" Madame Pomfrey pumped him full of dreamless sleep potion." James looked at Massi, his brown eyes clouded with worry. " He was fighting in his sleep. They aren't sure what wrong with him." 

" He's trying to repress whatever made him violent earlier. He doesn't want to face up to whatever it is in his head." Peter whistled. 

" You're really serious about becoming one of those mugle mind doctors, aren't you?" The girl nodded emphatically. 

" Just for this reason. Siruis is in trouble for something he couldn't control. I want to help him, and anyone else who needs it!" Remus leaned over, giving her a kiss on the cheek. 

" He's lucky you're a Maruder. We all are." 

" Remus." She punched him softly. " You're going to make me cry!" 

************

James stood up as the common's door swung open to let Massi in. 

" So?" He asked tensely." What happened..." She held up a hand to stem the flow of questions from the younger Maruders. 

" We did it!" She exclaimed as the others cheered. " It's a month of silitary in school suspension." 

" Solitary?" Lily asked. " But...?" Massi shrugged. 

" It was the best we could do. I'm exempt though, do to an absoult lack of magical physoanalysts." James sat down, laughing. 

" Thery're letting you shrink Padfoots head?" Massi glared. " I didn't mean it that way My." 

" Well, they can't spare any of the physicians from St.Mungo's to help a student who's lashing out James!" Lily scolded, comming to her friends' defense. " Massi's the best anyone could ask for, espically with all attacks by You-Know-Who." 

" Okay, I'll take that as a complement." Massi said dryly. " Besides, the people at St.Mungo's are trained to help and heal mental problems caused by magical reasons. They aren't trained in preventing a case in Sirius' stage." She said authoratively. The others nodded slowly, pretending they understood her spiel. " Oh, and guess what? There was an offical from the ministry on the board and he is talking to the Minister. They were impressed and offered to send me to get a full muggle degree in Physcology if I agree to come work for the ministry!" 

" Congratulations My!" James hugged her. " Wait untill we tell Sirius..." 

" You can't. He's already been moved into the spare room they're using. And I have to go to him now. First session and all." She waved once and spun, dissapearing out the portrait hole, dress robes fluttering behind her as she ran. 

She skidded to a stop in front of the stone gargoyle gurding the headmasters office. " Stella Canis." Jumping to the left instead of right, it admitted her into a small hallway leading into another room half the size of a dorm. Pushed into the corner was a standard four poster and curled in the center was Sirius, his expression haggard even in his sleep. She sat at his side. "Hey Siri." He blinked sleepily up at her. 

" My? Wha...?" 

" I spoke to the school board on your behalf today. You aren't going to be expelled. You're just going to be doing a month of in school suspension and you're going to have to speak with me, on a patiant/doctor schedual until I say you're better." 

" Qua?" Sirius sat up beside her and she took his hand. 

" Um, see, the school board said it was obvious that you weren't in any type of mental condition to be held responsible, but you can only stay in school if you get some help. Hell, they wanted to send you to St.Mungo's, but Professor Dumbledore told them that I could help you." 

" But I don't need help." He laughed. " I mean, yeah, i might have lost it a bit with Snape groping me in Potions class..." 

" Don't lie to yourself and don't lie to me!" Massi snapped, pulling her hand from his. " Do I need to get the Pensive from the hearing today and show you! No one becomes like that by being "groped" without a damn reason behind it!" Sirius turned his head from her. " Damnit, don't you get it! You're stuck here until I say you can go! If you don't work with me, I can't get you out by the full moon!" He turned to her, disbeliving. 

" Massi..." 

" No! Not unless you'll let me help you! If we don't find out what's really wrong, you could kill someone someday!" He was silent. " Fine! Asno! Jackass! I'll leave and you can think on your own if you want help or not!" She stormed towards the door. 

" I'm scared." She stopped at the soft, un-Sirius like admission. " See, I don't remeber what any of you say happened My. Nothing after getting the Dragon's bile and you know... I, I think I'm really scared this time." Turning, she walked back, slipping back onto the bed and hugging him tightly, stroking his hair, his shoulders hitching beneath her hands in silent tears. 

" Don't be scared Sirius. I'll help. It'll get better, I promise." 

************

** 9-14-77 I'm sure glad My talks better than I do. If it had been up to me, I would have been on the next train back to Hank's. I wasn't lying to her earlier. I think I really am kind of scared of what happens now. I mean, how do I talk to Massi and avoid telling her everything. I mean, I've spent quite a few years comming up with new and creative ways to avoid talking about Hank's house, so what do I do if My finds out? I mean, will she have to tell people? Like, doesn't the entire school board have to know? And the wizarding branch of S.S? Like I said, I didn't lie. I am scared. Because now everyone's going to know. **

Sirius. 

A/N: And as always, here's what Massi is saying today. 

Basta ya = enough, stop. 

Asno= jack ass. 

So there we go, the second part of Break. Some people didn't seem to realize that the first part was just that, so I think this is the part where I say to be continued. To Be Continued... 


End file.
